Obama's Birth Certificate Proves He's Not From Earth

In another distraction meant to keep American voters away from the real issues, Fox News channel announced today that the GOP is in possession of a birth certificate proving beyond doubt that Barack Obama's real birthplace is, in fact, planet Lappa IV, located in the Alpha Quadrant and inhabited by a splinter group of the Ferengi species, who have developed a highly collectivist culture based on the principles of socialist acquisition and redistribution of wealth.